ATLANTA — Tonight's presidential debate ended abruptly when Donald Trump was
served with papers notifying him that he had been indicted for the murder of
an elderly man on CNN.

"Hey, I didn't do anything!" Trump told authorities. "He was like that when
I got here!"

Trump, who had planned to debate President Joe Biden, argued that the
strange old man keeled over all on his own.

"The very idea..." the old man said before slumping over onto a nearby
podium. It was also at this point that Trump discovered the man had been
propped up by an apparatus and could not stand on his own.

"You know, I got here and everything was fine. CNN is fake news, but I'm
here and they've been nice tonight," Trump said. "But then there was this
dead old man in the corner. And I thought, wow, the game must be afoot, you
know? And believe me, I was about to solve this murder before you got here."

"Yeah, yeah," said Officer Nolan of the APD. "Why don't we talk about this
downtown."

At publishing time, Trump had been indicted again for the murder of the
Democratic Party.

https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-indicted-for-murdering-elderly-man-on-cnn