090423A
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Your discovery
that you are living
stuck between floors
on an elevator run.

Someone would tell you
that it is a state of mind
but that too can represent
the conditions of reality.

Your having no way
to make it go up
or go down
and the doors do not open.

You hear distant voices
from corridors and penthouse
but there is no information
between bursts of laughter.

Threatening rumblings
rise u p from the pit
somewhere in a sub basement
of imagined torment scenes.

You have been there
what seems forever
getting jerked around
in between floors.

No one hears
the alarm sounding
so you sit there
waiting for it to move.

Someone is in control
but it is never you
and all you are is stuck
in between floors.

---------------------

100423A
-----------

We have all become
the very same
destroyers of worlds
as if there is no other way.

Denials and affirmations
are the meaningless prattle
the mumble mouthed
failures and interlocutions.

What is the real purpose
that exists in all the making
becomes so much breaking
and only the ghosts really know.

They know what was there
where the voices lived
and what remains after
is tied to the dust of forever.

Saviours and culture heroes
along with the sweet things
of what is now a museum past
in process of re-definition.

No one does that anymore
and you are left to wonder why
in a world increasingly stripped
of what was truth and beauty.

--------------------------------

110423A:
------------

It goes down,
down, down, down,
taking that feeling with it
that plunges inside of you
forced up into the throat
a heavy gut lump
threatening to turn to vomit.

All those things
that you wanted to do
that can never be done
and your being misinformed
by the historical facts
that people used to do them
but no one does it anymore.

At least no one you know
and knowing is itself
a sweet thing of the past
that the dying reminisce on
and the young keep denying
any real knowledge of
crowing like legendary cocks.

The betrayals are memorable
and whatever you started
someone else came and ended
with their selfish motives
having no real or good reasons
beyond sharing bad habits
with their usual wrecking crews.

You could try to tell them
it was not always that way
but the noise of the brain wash
would drown out your words
leaving your mouth bubbling
its incoherent bursts
into gone vague and empty.

You know you should stop
talking about anything
that merely proves
your inability at playing music
and a similar gross lack
of any other social skills
such as Trivial Pursuit.

There is nothing left to do
except learn to consume
the types of products
that are deemed appropriate
to your income level
where you are made to believe
freedom is now too expensive.

The good stuff is out of reach
and even if you could afford it
there would be no use for it
as that is out of reach too
and that is about privilege
that you cannot ever buy
with any amount of money.

People do not do things
with other people anymore
unless they want to get
what you do not have
or do not want to give them
in exchange for something
you do not want to get.

And if you try to talk
they refuse to hear you
because you are not saying
what they want to hear
and there is no point in that
because it leads to nowhere
that you would want it to go.

They declare your vision blind
and your viewpoints void
in accusations of sleep walking
cancelling your dreams out
with categorical determinations
as to who they say you are
contrary to anything you want to be.

The only place left
to really feel comfortable
is somewhere in the past
but no one that you know
wants to live there anymore
and it is no fun alone
no matter what you dream.

Rumours of life style choices
available somewhere down the line
but you never seem to get there
to that particular station
where someone might be waiting
for what is left of your type
travelling the ruins of the underground.

------------------------------------------------

110423B
-----------

Turning pulp fiction
into papier mache
so you can build a world
out of the stray letters
some still clinging
to their syllables.

The universe an inscription
that we cannot read
in hardly knowing anything
about its alphabet soup
formed primordial words
expressing strange ideas.

We are left with explanations
proposed to us by savages
who would kill
simply to make those true
and civilizations are built
on those types of lies.

Another typical cabal
supported by the syndicates
who secretly approve
as well as secretly condemn
the various statements
the accounts and terminations

The truth never has a chance
against pulp fiction
and maybe it is for the best
that it remains that way
as to the papier mache
of all those alphabets.

We try to read the surface
intrigued by that thin shell
but experience always says
it would all be destroyed
if we were to shatter it
in any effort to get inside.

It causes us to stop trying
having become discouraged
by always breaking things
to try to get out the meanings
as if we could find
some secretly beautiful truth.

There are plenty of rumours
as to secret and beautiful truths
but there are no invitations
and all you really know of any
is the long road back around
between rows of gates and fences.

-----------------------------------------

120423A
-----------

There is no point going
to where someone talks
what I do not want to hear
especially from whom
I do not want to hear it said
and with contrary intentions.

Those who secretly want
some of that usual ugliness
that drives their conversations
out of a hungry darkness
claiming captive territories
and building their walls.

Sometimes that is all there is
as to any chances at going
so one counts it as gone
and that is all there really is
to relieve that added tension
that there is no good need of.

Leaving those usual conditions
of various types of social siege
the way the French say it
in between a croissant and wine
as the clock times out
the duration of that nausea.

I find I am not really free
to do any of what I intended
and much less what I wanted
but I am more free to pretend
that I have been broken out
from that other type of prison.

Another way of becoming
another type of obsolescent
brand caught up in the stream
of the latest obsolescence
took decades to develop
in time for no longer wanted.

Between the oppression
that is other people
and the oppression of mortality
there is not really very much
other than more wanting
for what life routinely denies.

Perhaps it is always too late
to begin all over again
but still far too early
to give in to the executioner
so we get tangled up between
those two styles of ritual.

The old ways having failed
we try to find new ways
to spend the remaining time
carrying the latest banners
that announce our uncertainties
along with a marching band.

What we started at long ago
takes a long time to achieve
but by then it is unpopular
having been replaced
by something we do not like
and would never want to do.

Many cave in to the coercion
as to doing whatever it is
that they never want to do
simply to acquire some of anyone
who does the same
and some call that happiness.

-----------------------------------

120423B
-----------

Maybe what we really long for
is for when it was possible
to enjoy some novelty
without any sense of guilt.

When it was possible to like
something that was different
from what the others wanted
without being rejected by that.

When we could be the surprise
or find the surprise
that came in the package
that we could have hoped for.

That was called opening up
in a more real way than confessions
muttered to priests or psychology
in the hopes of settled claims.

Realizing it still gets you nowhere
that you really want to be
and is that punishment or reward
asks the little man in the Dark Lodge.

Nowadays if it is something odd
that you happen to like chances
it will never like you in return
and too ordinary will hound you.

It is the too ordinary kills it
then drags in the lifeless remains
as if that is a peace offering
to be left on your doorstep.

They do not really want you
to really like anything at all
that is not mass produced
including you or anyone else.

Your brand no longer available
and no longer marketable
no one wants to deal
those types of goods anymore.